This is something I was really interested in when I was getting ready to move out here. I’ve lived in Tokyo for three years, and while there are a few blogs out there with the black man’s perspective on life in Japan, I still don’t so see much from the black female point of view. And just like everywhere else in the world, the experience for women is different from the experience for men. So I wanna put this out there for future sisters looking to move to Japan who are wondering what to expect.
Is there racism?
Honestly? Yes, which is why I can’t see raising a family here. The racism is systematic and well known among the non-Japanese community. It’s not strange for a bar to have a “no foreigners” sign or for non-Japanese to be denied an apartment because the landlord “doesn’t rent to foreigners.” And you’ll have people on top of trucks in front of stations sometimes yelling for foreigners to go back home. I do feel it’s a little worse for people of color (African descent, Chinese, Indian, Korean etc.) than it is for Whites. I had my own issues when trying to rent an apartment that I blogged about here.
But I think Japan is changing, and catching up with the rest of the developed world in terms of human rights. Many people are also kind and understanding, and ashamed of their more inhospitable countrymen. The younger generation especially seems less tolerant of racism, and I’m optimistic about the future.
What’s it like dating in Japan? Do Japanese guys like black girls?
This is tough. I won’t lie, dating as a foreign woman in Japan is hard, and even harder as a black foreign woman. I’ve dated Japanese guys but I’ve never “dealt with” a Japanese guy, ifyuhknowwhatImean. Japanese men do occasionally hit on me, which still surprises me because, just like I heard before coming over, a lot of them are very shy.
I know at least two black girls who are in long term relationships with a Japanese dude. I know others who have “dealt with” or even exclusively “deal with” Japanese guys. I myself have never made it past three dates. They up and disappear around that time. Maybe they get scared, I dunno.
One thing that’s frustrating is never knowing if a Japanese guy likes YOU, or just thinks you’d match nicely with his Timberlands and his New York Yankees hat.
If you don’t wanna date a Japanese dude, you’ll probably end up with an English teacher or a military guy. They’re the most common sources of non-Japanese men in Japan. But if a guy, non-Japanese or Japanese, says, “I don’t like Japanese girls,” SERIOUSLY reconsider him because, 1) that’s ignorant, and 2) he’s probably lying.
Want more info? Here’s a post on Zooming Japan: All You Ever Wanted to Know About Dating Japanese Men
Where can I get my hair done?
Within the Tokyo area this isn’t so hard. There are a few salons you can go to, the most well known being Room 806, literally a room in an apartment building. You can also buy product there. They had a website but it’s gone, so here’s some info.
Another one is Hayato, again in Roppongi.
This one comes from New York, and comes highly recommended by a friend of mine, whose hair is always bangin’. Ask for China.
For ladies looking to live well outside Tokyo, I think what happens is girls link up and do each other’s hair, or handle it on their own.
As for me, I’m in the “handle it on their own” camp. I’m too cheap/poor for the salons out here, which are a bit more expensive than what you’re probably used to back home.
I stopped relaxing before I came, and I load up my suitcase with product every time I go back home. I also have two flat irons I brought with me that get really hot–up to 450F.
I know those were my biggest concerns coming out here. Is there anything else you wanna know? Hit up my inbox through the contact form and let me know.